Yes, Anything's Possible
But why does that scare you? Thoughts on potential.
A while back I accompanied a friend to an event that wasn’t quite my vibe. It was a mixer for financial services professionals, who tend to be a bit more serious and analytical where I might be more whimsical and clownish. Don’t get me wrong – I don’t play about my work – but when I’m hanging out, I’m hanging out, you know? I was talking to a couple people I’d met there about summer plans when I made the error of sharing some personal aspirations with the group, vague information about trips I hope to take soon and the projects I plan to work on during my travels. The shift was swift. Immediately the conversation went from congenial to critical, with my companions seemingly committed to poking holes in my plans. (This is partially why I prefer to hang out with other delulu bitches like me.)
One of the countries I planned to visit was dangerous, especially for Black people, one white guy mentioned. (I’d argue that these here United States aren’t particularly safe for Black people either, though I didn’t say that in the moment.). Another location was known to be rather expensive – had I considered that? (I had.) It continued like that for some time, them lobbing questions at me like I was on the witness stand and they were opposing counsel. Or, to use a more apt comparison befitting a pair of finance bros, like my personal plans were an investment they were considering making, and they needed to perform the necessary due diligence. I defended my plans for some time before I had a thought – literally who cares what these guys think lmao? So I smiled and nodded until I procured another free drink. Eventually the invisible “save me” vibes I was putting out reached my friend and she finally crossed the room to rescue me.
As we were parting ways to mingle with other people, they wished me luck with my plans, but not without a final warning to be careful because “anything can happen.” I hadn’t put much stock into anything they said anyway, but this phrase made me realize that they weren’t haters – they just saw the world fundamentally differently than I do, and so we would never understand each other. I thanked them for their advice, and they disappeared from my reality as easily as they entered it.
I find that people often say things like, “well, anything can happen,” in a kind of finger-wagging tone, a warning to keep you on your toes and aware of the worst case scenarios. But that idea doesn’t strike fear into my heart. On the contrary, it actually gets me hype – in fact, it might actually be the most exciting thing I’ve ever heard. When I consider that “anything can happen,” my creative faculties kick in, imagining all the lives I can create because it affirms to me that nothing is out of reach and I can pivot and restart and run it back as many times as I need to until I’m satisfied. It takes the same amount of energy for me to imagine the best option as it does for me to envision the worst one, so why would I opt to spend my time thinking about what I don’t want to happen as opposed to what I actually do? Of course, we should all be thoughtful and aware, especially when it comes to travel to unfamiliar places, but the idea of possibility should invigorate, not paralyze us.
I’m known to cosplay as a woman in STEM from time to time (I learned HTML so I could add a pink glittery background to my MySpace), so indulge me for a moment. In physics, it's understood that atoms are made of 99% potential energy. This is static, stored energy that can be converted into force, a push or pull on an object, or, put more simply, motion. If atoms are made of 99% potential, and we are made up of atoms – you see where I’m going with this. It stands to reason that we are also made of 99% potential energy waiting to be put into motion by the choices we make. I can see how this can be frightening – it puts the onus on us to go out and pull the lives we want out of the ether. But it’s also pretty groovy, because it reminds us that with vision, dedicated action, and belief in ourselves we can build our own tables instead of asking for seats.
In my field, the most successful people who look like me cut through the wilderness to create their own paths outside of the norm. Issa Rae created a web series that turned into Insecure, a critically acclaimed HBO series that’s become a cultural touchstone and an instant classic. Quinta Brunson, whose skits about finally being liberated from the bondage of dating broke men went viral on Instagram over a decade ago, flipped that into a job at Buzzfeed that set off a string of events that brought her to where she is now, the Emmy award-winning creator, producer, and star of Abbott Elementary. So yes, when you set out into the unknown, you don’t know where you might end up – and thank God for that. Don’t let anyone’s limiting beliefs turn you into the limiting reagent of your own life (me rn: 👩🏾🔬🔬🧪). After all, anything can happen.
Lola xx